When the voices actually help

Usually I talk about how bad the voices are. The voices are awful, so I can’t do this event. The voices interjected thoughts, so I can’t write this paper. The voices are making me a puppet, so I’ll…

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Eric Atwood Of The Speakers Studio On The 5 Things You Need To Be A Highly Effective Public Speaker

An Interview With Fotis Georgiadis

At some point in our lives, many of us will have to give a talk to a large group of people. What does it take to be a highly effective public speaker? How can you improve your public speaking skills? How can you overcome a fear of speaking in public? What does it take to give a very interesting and engaging public talk? In this interview series called “5 Things You Need To Be A Highly Effective Public Speaker” we are talking to successful and effective public speakers to share insights and stories from their experience. As a part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Eric Atwood.

As a certified Speaking Circles® and Relational Presence facilitator, Eric helps people overcome social anxiety and public speaking fear so they can express themselves confidently, powerfully and authentically in any situation.

Currently residing in Atlanta, Georgia, Eric has lived in seven countries and traveled worldwide, bringing a deep knowledge, understanding and passion for language, cultures and people to his work and his life.

Eric is also the author of the book New Thinking New Being: Moving From “The Daily Grind” to a More Meaningful, Deeply Fulfilling Life.

Thank you so much for doing this with us! Our readers would love to get to know you a bit better. Can you tell us the story of how you grew up?

I grew up living in the following countries: Malaysia (where I was born), Honduras, Colombia, Afghanistan and India. My father was the Country Director for CARE®, so we were posted to a different country every few years. I went to American schools in the capital cities of these countries, where children of diplomats from other countries were allowed to attend. I also traveled to more than 50 countries when I was young. Much of my worldview was formed by living in and traveling to these countries and consorting with/being friends with people from all over the world. It helped me be very open-minded, connected to and accepting of people from all cultures, with a consistent desire to explore different places, people and cultures worldwide. After graduating from the American Embassy School in New Delhi, India, I moved to California (it was the first time I had ever lived in the US) to attend college. After graduating from the University of California, Riverside, I began my professional career.

Can you share a story with us about what brought you to this specific career path?

From pre-adolescence to the age of 40, I was a very shy person who saw the world as a harsh place. When I turned 40, I was living in New Zealand with my wife. I had my own consulting business and a small circle of friends, but I realized I was very unhappy. I decided I needed to make a big change in my personal and professional life. For the next five years, I went through what I have labeled my “Personal Development Years.” I went to counseling, did numerous self-assessments, read a lot of self-help books, and enrolled in various personal development courses and workshops. With all those experiences under my belt, I was able to release many of my limited beliefs that were keeping me stagnant and unhappy. I realized I had many gifts to share, passions to cultivate and people to connect with. More than anything, I wanted to make a bigger difference in the world.

One of the things I found in that five-year period was Speaking Circles®, a speaking technique that helps people overcome public speaking fear (one of my many fears at the time), to speak from the heart (rather than only from the head) and to connect deeply with their audiences using different practices (including Relational Presence, which is the practice of being with one person at a time in a group setting). I attended these Circles for three years — and it transformed how I interacted with people. Realizing that public speaking is one of humans’ greatest fears, I decided I wanted to help people overcome this fear using the practices I had learned. I enrolled in the certification training and become a Speaking Circles Facilitator in 2011. Soon after that, I started my own business called The Speakers Studio. Ever since then, I have coached and trained hundreds of people to be better public speakers and communicators in all settings (including virtually), and I have also done a fair amount of public speaking.

Can you tell us the most interesting story that happened to you since you began your career?

I would say the most interesting thing that has happened to me since I began my coaching, training and facilitation business is that, as a result of the pandemic, I’ve found ways to pivot my business online so I and the people I coach/train/facilitate can use and benefit from the same practices I teach in in-person settings in virtual environments. Equally interesting, I have discovered novel ways for people to interact with and engage others in virtual settings that they cannot experience in-person. One example: gazing into the camera lens while speaking allows everyone in a virtual space to see your eyes, which is something that cannot be done or experienced in an in-person setting (only the person you’re looking at is able to see your eyes). Thus, I have found additional applications of the work I do and the practices I teach that I probably would not have explored or discovered had I not been forced to pivot my business into the virtual space due to the pandemic.

Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

One of the funniest things that happened to me early in my business was facilitating a training session at a military base. Given the many restrictions and protocols required to enter the base for non-military personnel and staff, I decided to give myself what I thought was plenty of time to drive from my hotel to the base, get my badge and other materials that would grant me access to the base, and arrive at the training classroom with about a half hour to spare. However, little did I know that for about the next hour and a half, I would be on a wild goose chase trying to find the place where they would issue my badge/materials and then find the classroom on the base. I went to literally six or seven different places (including a church) trying to find the right buildings. People’s verbal directions and my GPS were not helping, my training contact was not answering her phone when I called her, and I was in full panic mode as the training start time quickly approached. I finally got everything I needed and arrived at the classroom about 15 minutes after the class was supposed to start, which was not a good look for a facilitator!

What I learned from this ordeal was from that point on, whenever I had a training or speaking engagement, I would 1) make sure I had all the information I needed at least a day in advance of the engagement, including all the directions and materials I would need to get to where I needed to go, and 2) I would give myself extra time that day to get to the venue with plenty of time to spare, allowing for traffic or any other possible delays or circumstances that might prevent me from arriving early. The lesson I learned and applied from that moment was that logistical considerations (which sometimes includes setting up audio-visual equipment) are often equally important as preparing the actual content you are presenting in your training, talk or presentation.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

My wife, Athena, was the person who was most instrumental in starting me on the path I am on now. Knowing what a difference Speaking Circles had made in my life and how passionate I was about it, she encouraged me to enroll in the certification training and even helped me start and build my business. (She is a leadership coach and trainer, so she is very skilled at helping people with their professional and business goals.) Although we are no longer married, we are still good friends who are in regular contact with each other, and she continues to support me in my business and other areas of my life.

You have been blessed with great success in a career path that can be challenging and intimidating. Do you have any words of advice for others who may want to embark on this career path, but seem daunted by the prospect of failure?

While there were certainly many challenges in building my business and getting me to where I am now, I stuck with it from the beginning, learned from some early struggles, and did what was necessary to succeed as an entrepreneur. For anyone who is embarking on a career path of being an entrepreneur or professional speaker, I offer the following words of advice:

What drives you to get up every day and give your talks? What is the main empowering message that you aim to share with the world?

I am driven each day to empower others to communicate confidently and authentically in all settings (with one person or many, in-person or virtually) and to connect with others in meaningful, enjoyable and powerful ways. Whether I’m coaching someone to do this, or training a group of people to do this, or speaking in front of a group explaining how they can do this, I feel as if I’m in my element and I can see the results of my efforts. I realized at the age of 40 that serving others and making a difference in the world was my life’s mission. When I discovered how I was going to do that — teaching what I teach now — this has been my ultimate daily motivation.

The main empowering message I want to share with the world is that it’s vitally important that you speak your truth, be fully who you are (without trying to be someone else or hiding your true self from others), and appreciate others for exactly who they are (without judging them or seeing the differences between ourselves and them). When we do each of these things, we share important information and details with others, we feel good about ourselves, and we feel deeply connected with others in the most meaningful and gratifying way possible.

You have such impressive work. What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now? Where do you see yourself heading from here?

I am currently developing an online course that will help people overcome social anxiety and public speaking anxiety using some of the practices I teach, and I plan to launch it later this year. I am also crafting a TEDx Talk that I plan to deliver next year. In the coming years, I see myself creating other online courses and programs, running workshops and retreats (online and in-person), training teams in companies, writing a book related to the work I do, and doing many more public talks and presentations on the practices I teach.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

One of my favorite life lesson quotes that I heard during my Personal Development Years (see above) was “Don’t worry about what others think of you; they are too busy worrying about what you think of them.” One of the reasons I was so shy and had social anxiety and public speaking anxiety when I was younger is that I was terrified that other people disliked me or disapproved of me, which is why I mostly kept to myself and withdrew from others. This quote, along with some deep inner work that I did during this period of my life, made me realize that what I had been doing for most of my life was projecting my fears and judgments onto others. I realized that most people didn’t think badly of me, but were in fact quite interested in me and liked who I was.

Once I discovered this, I was able to open up to other people more readily. I had a lot to share with others, I was genuinely interested in them, and being this way was both enjoyable and a way to connect with others in a very meaningful and rewarding way. With these insights in hand, I have been able to teach others how to simply be themselves in their interactions (one-on-one and in group settings) and to not worry too much about what others thought of them.

Ok, thank you for all that. Here is the main question of our interview. What are your “5 Things You Need To Be A Highly Effective Public Speaker?” Please share a story or example for each.

As you know, many people are terrified of speaking in public. Can you give some of your advice about how to overcome this fear?

In my experience, here are some good ways to overcome the fear of public speaking:

You are a person of huge influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?

I would inspire a movement in which people a) thought of others more often (instead of thinking only themselves) and b) saw the similarities between themselves and others, instead of the differences. In my view, part of the reason there is so much conflict and unhappiness in the world is that most of us are quite self-centered (we only think of what we want or what matters to us) and that when these people do see/hear/interact with others, they see them as separate or different from themselves. If we all saw each other as equals, respected and appreciated everyone for who they are, and considered ways we could support other people with whom we were interacting, there would certainly be a lot less conflict and unhappiness in the world.

Is there a person in the world whom you would love to have lunch with, and why? Maybe we can tag them and see what happens!

Barrack Obama would be one person I’d enjoy having lunch with. I’d love to find out as many things as possible that he did to get to where he got, how he overcame his obstacles, what inspired him to keep moving forward, what helped him be a great speaker, and any lessons he’s learned that he’d like to pass on to future generations.

Are you on social media? How can our readers follow you online?

Here are my main social media accounts:

This was so informative, thank you so much! We wish you continued success!

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